Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Boobs are out for the taking
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
