I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
