Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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