i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
