I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
