no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
