Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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