do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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