I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I intend to get homeless drunk
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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