We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
