i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
