I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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