what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
oh god was she eating orange peels again
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
