I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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