I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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