remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
