idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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