and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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