Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
