oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
