Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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