Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
