I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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