I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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