I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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