3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize