So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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