I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
