For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
