You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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