Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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