It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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