idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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