You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
love makes seman taste better
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I can't turn off my feet"
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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