I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
