god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
