Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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