My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
