Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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