he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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