Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
