Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I think people are normalizing furries
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
