Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
We left the knife in your bed.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
