i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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