Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I love you. Go after that dick
Randomize
