But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
