would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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