the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
