So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
