It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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